Shenpa: Part 3 – A Recipe for Disappointment

As human beings we will have some sense of attachment. If we could simply wave a wand and get completely rid of it to be like the Buddhas and bodhisattvas, that would be wonderful, but this is difficult because we do need to function in our world, and we find that we need to have some sense of this “attachment mind” in our lives.

So again, the problem is the shenpa that is there inside the attachment. In a similar way, we need to have hopes, and I think hope is an important aspect of the human mind. We may have the genuine hope to attain enlightenment, a hope to make progress on the path. That, in itself is not unreasonable. But if you have a strong sense of shenpa along with it, then there is a problem.

Having some sense of fear in your life is also not that big of a problem, because we do need to have some experience of fear in order to avoid falling into certain traps.  We need to have fear of the negative consequences from engaging in hurtful or destructive deeds, which produce negative karma.

None of this appears unreasonable; in fact, this is all quite intelligent. Such understanding may even be based upon a certain wisdom. But then again, if there is tremendous shenpa mixed in with the fear, I think it becomes a problem.

It’s the same with trying to avoid some things in one’s life, or trying to push things away. We do need to push some things away or avoid specific things. We naturally push things away that are negative or that have a negative influence on us, causing pain and suffering. So, I don’t think that process is a problem; it seems very reasonable to have that response.

We also need to have some sense of abandoning what is unhealthy. For instance, we need to abandon negative emotions and having a neurotic mind. We need to have the capacity and desire to develop that ability. It’s not only reasonable, but the teachings at all levels suggest it. So, it’s not a problem. It is intelligent and is based on wisdom. But, the element of shenpa in there is a problem.

The teachings say that having a thought come up in one’s mind is not a problem. Nor are emotions that come up in one’s mind a problem. But what is the problem is having thoughts or emotions where you also have a strong shenpa associated.

Generally speaking, shenpa is more closely allied with emotion than with thought. But here again, within the fabric of the emotion, it may be just a particular element of that emotion that is the shenpa.

For instance, the emotion of love is cherished in all the Buddhist traditions and especially in the Mahayana tradition. But if you have shenpa there, along with the love, then I think that love becomes neurotic or problematic. So, even with emotions we can’t say that an entire emotion is a shenpa, but rather that there’s an element in the emotion that is more of a shenpa. So it is that which we must get rid of.

In the practice of meditation we may have an experience of a clear mind, or a spacious mind. A practitioner has to go through many of these positive experiences. But if a practitioner gets caught up in the shenpa of that experience, then instead of that practice becoming one that really liberates one from the suffering of samsara, the experience actually begins to change our whole practice into a kind of spiritual materialism.

So far we’ve spoken a lot about shenpa, but another concrete example would be helpful. Let’s say, for instance, that someone is a good practitioner and diligently practices. If this person has some sense of shenpa about being a good practitioner, thinking “I’m a diligent, good practitioner” and emotionally clings to this image of being a good, diligent practitioner then there’s something a little extra there beyond just being a diligent practitioner.

We could say this is arrogant, but it has more to do with shenpa, emotionally clinging to that idea. That actually changes the person completely, from being a good diligent practitioner into being a neurotic person. If anyone criticizes or suggests that person may not be a good practitioner, it shouldn’t make any difference, because he is a good practitioner. But because of that shenpa, this person gets totally shaken up at such a criticism, and feels a tremendous threat of losing his whole identity in the face of such criticism.

Here’s another common example. Say, somebody is very beautiful. Whether someone else confirms you are beautiful or somebody criticizes you, you are what you are. But due to having a shenpa about being beautiful, if somebody criticizes your looks, you feel incredibly threatened or shaky inside because of that shenpa. The comments don’t change your appearance at all. But with the shenpa present, it makes a lot of difference to your mind and your emotions.

There is so much shenpa present in our consciousness, and there is so much shenpa that is not yet in our conscious mind. Sometimes it is the teachings that make it clear, and sometimes it is the phenomenal world of experience that makes clear for us where our shenpa is. We should appreciate those moments and take them positively, although it’s a painful experience. To be grateful and have a positive attitude toward that kind of exposure is important so that we don’t take it in the ordinary conventional way and become discouraged or hopeless.

There are many examples demonstrating how we can enjoy our lives much more when we don’t have shenpa, because then life is what it is. When you have shenpa, then you don’t really enjoy what is happening. You’re incapacitated and unable to appreciate what is around you.

For instance, if you’re on vacation and your perspective of the vacation does not include much shenpa, then you will likely enjoy it. But if you lose that perspective, and take events very seriously, you might never get out of your rented room, and spend all your time cleaning up. By the time you clean and fix up your room, your vacation might be over.

I would like to point out how sometimes people do think that having a shenpa is a source of pleasure, or that it is the shenpa which actually makes us have more happiness or joy. If you examine this closely, you’ll see how untrue this is, and how it is just an illusion. Some people persist earnestly with this illusion. But in fact it is not true.

For instance, you can go to a restaurant and order food. And you may really enjoy the meal. Then you develop some shenpa to that food, so you go back next time and order the same thing, but now with the shenpa. You are likely to find you don’t enjoy it as much as the first time. You’re a little disappointed that it didn’t taste as good. It’s the same food, but the shenpa has spoiled it.

At some times we have more shenpa than at other times. For some things we have more shenpa, and for other things less shenpa. Wherever we have more shenpa, we experience that much more suffering and pain.

So, shenpa is sort of like a toxic drink that has the quality of blinding your mind. It makes you lose your rational mind, your objectivity, and also makes you lose any kind of joy or happiness. As soon as you develop a shenpa, then something that you may be enjoying turns un-enjoyable right away because of the emotional clinging. So, shenpa is that which ruins one’s whole well-being and sense of a calm and peaceful mind, it affect one’s wisdom and intelligence and produces suffering and heartache.

In the ordinary conventional way, we tend to think that without the shenpa—once it is exposed or destroyed—we can’t have a pleasant life, or we expect all our circumstances and situations to spiral downward. But as a practitioner we have to have the opposite attitude.

It’s not true that without the emotional clinging you cannot enjoy life and have all the functions of a clear mind. You certainly can have all the functions of mind and enjoy yourself and your life much more without the shenpa. If shenpa does arise and we recognize it right away and some heartache occurs as a result, then right away we should appreciate getting rid of the shenpa as a great lesson of life and a blessing. So, in that way, as practitioners, we are somewhat different from conventional people who don’t have the same understanding of shenpa.

Excerpted and Edited from Personal Link talk #52 – 8/8/99